The Story of Us - Part Five

Just how many installments is this going take? I'm as curious as you are.


I can tell you, we're more than halfway to the end.


More than a little disenchanted by the hooligans gentlemen I was meeting on Match.com, I joined a similar dating site called Catholicmatch. Actually, I joined to keep a watchful big sisterly eye on the people my little sis was meeting on there back in Pennsylvania.

I could tell that the caliber of person on this site was different. It didn't seem like such a meat market.

I mean, don't get me wrong, it had its share of weirdos too, including one guy who learned I spoke French and, when I told him I wasn't really interested in giving him my phone number after we'd emailed back and forth a few times, wrote me a HUGE letter professing his love for me and telling me how he had envisioned us together under the Eiffel tower. There was something about roses and violins playing in the background.

Seriously. You can't make this stuff up!

But I liked knowing that at least we were coming from the same basic worldview. I had talked to one guy in particular (not Patrick) who interested me for several weeks, online and on the phone, only to have the same thing happen again once we met in person: no sparks, strained conversation and no communication afterwards.

Frustrated and seriously fed up with the entire process, I considered bringing my Internet dating era to an end, and wondered if I really was going to wind up alone.

Was that God's plan for me?

Could I accept that?

I wasn't sure that I could, but figured I'd better start working on it, since He wasn't really asking for my input.

I knew His timing was best - I'd seen it evidenced in my life over and over again - but I didn't want to keep waiting for something that wasn't ever going to happen. I remember praying in the shower every day: God, please help me to trust you!

I was homesick and sad and not sure what to do next.

Can you see where this is going?

When exactly was it that I received a "smile" from someone named Patrick? It may as well have been the very next day after I hit my emotional rock bottom.

Just a smile.

A feature that let me know that he looked at my profile and was interested.

It didn't show a ton of initiative, and by this point, I was really good at sorting the wheat from the chaff, but his profile seemed intelligent, well written. He liked some of the same movies I did.

None of the same music (does that really say Steve Winwood? What year is it?) but hey, he could change.

I sent him a short email and he replied by giving me his phone number and telling me to call him sometime.

Um...no.

That was not going to happen and I told him as much.

It was just before Thanksgiving, and I remember trading a few emails with him while I was home with my family. It was the year the power went out just about 2 hours into cooking the turkey. I told him how we had waited a half hour or so for it to come back on, then when it hadn't, we'd loaded everything up in the car to take it to my Aunt's house...only to have it come back on as soon as we'd gotten the last thing in.

Patrick was living in New Hampshire with his mom and three of his sisters. His father had passed away nine years before and he was helping his mom take care of the big farmhouse they lived in.

He worked outside of Boston, in Waltham, and suggested that perhaps we should maybe meet in person to get to know each other better.

After all of my other experiences, I thought this sounded just wonderful. We wouldn't have the time to romanticize, and I'd get to see him for who he really was, not just who he was on paper.

Er...on screen?

I agreed.

His first suggestion was go-karting, but I shot that one right down.

He came up with something much better - drinks at a little pub that had live music in the Colonial Inn in Concord.

We'd meet December 4, 2004.

Monday musings

I have the flu.


Or maybe it's not the flu - maybe it's just a cold that had me feeling achy and feverish the first day (Saturday), and sniffling, sneezing, coughing, aching, stuffy head, fever so you can rest medicine since then but either way, I'm feeling...blah.


I spent the majority of the weekend in bed. Not easy to do with two young boys, but Patrick helped a lot and I ended up having PJ in bed with me a lot too (hooray for passing on antibodies for your illnesses to your babies when you're breastfeeding!).


Now, Patrick seems to be starting to feel blah too.

We're good at sharing.


However, my appetite has been nonexistant, so I'm looking on the bright side: maybe it will put me that much closer to reaching my weight-loss goal of 50 pounds by the end of the year. Remember that one? Yeah, well...I'm not exactly setting any records in the slim-down department, but according to this morning's hop on the scale, I am down 18 pounds since I first posted about it.

That leaves me with just 32 pounds to go.

In around nine weeks.

It's doable, right?

(Don't answer that.)

Anyway, I did manage to squeeze into a pair of pre-pregnancy jeans today and it has inspired me.

It's funny, battling baby weight while I'm still uncertain about whether I want to have another baby. I mean, to work so hard to get it all off only to get pregnant again seems ludicrous. And it generally is about the six-month-old mark, when your baby is sitting up and giggling and sleeping better and so interactive that you start to entertain thoughts like, "Yeah, I could do this one more time..." even though for the last five months, you've been thinking "Never, never, never, never again!"

Not that I'm looking to have another babe any time soon.

I'm just saying...

Here's a video of my breakfast with Jack yesterday morning.

I love hearing what he has to say.

And that he doesn't ask me who's writing my questions.

The Story of Us - Part Four

I figured that since I knew no one in Boston, and since I was living on a teacher's salary (Savings? What's that?), the best way to move there might be to find a job as a live-in nanny and maybe go to school at the same time.

I found a job with a family in Wellesley, Massachusetts (posh posh!) and lived with two amazing kids and their mom, who was a lawyer and traveled a lot.

My belongings fit into the U-haul like a jigsaw puzzle, and used just about every single square inch of space. (How does a single woman accumulate so much junk?) My brother and I drove the U-haul up from Philadelphia while my parents and sister followed in their car. It was a hot Friday in July, and the air conditioner in the truck didn't work. Matt kept challenging people to races at the tolls through the open window, which was hilarious considering the thing was fully loaded and topped out at about 50 mph full throttle.

The family was away the weekend I moved in, and so we had the house to ourselves as we unloaded my things and put them into my little rooms above the garage. This was to be my new home. For how long, I didn't know.

I cried when my family left. I didn't think I would.

It just hit me: What on earth was I doing here?!

The family returned that Sunday evening, and I settled into life as a nanny. It had its challenges, but I loved spending time with the kids. On weekends, I'd venture into the city to try to learn my way around.

I loved Boston. I loved the history (and I hate History). I loved that I could walk around the whole city in a day. I loved the museums and the Commons and the Garden, walking around Beacon Hill and window shopping on Newbury Street. I loved watching the street performers outside of Quincy Market. I went into town every Saturday and walked around by myself.

I took my GREs and applied to Boston College for their Master's in Teaching program.

I tried Match.com again, in an effort to get out and start meeting people since I often had weekends off. I went on a few dates, but didn't really click with anyone.

By November, I had been in Boston for four months and I was starting to get pretty lonely. I mean, sure I lived with a family, but they weren't my family. I was alone most of the day while the kids were in school - running errands or doing laundry, alone in the evenings after they went to bed, and alone on the weekends.

I felt like maybe I'd made a mistake.

Rock the vote

Okay, so we're not really rocking the vote on The Office.


Maybe not everyone knows what Jumping the Shark means.


Maybe not everyone watches The Office.


Either way, I guess I've missed the mark for a Hot Topic.


That's okay.


I'll do another shameless plug for my Mystery Hostess show. Don't forget about it! If you have kids to buy holiday gifts for, it's a great place to get them and have the chance to earn free stuff! It runs until November 14th.

Last night, Patrick had a dinner meeting, so I thought it would be the perfect time to pull out two of the frozen mini pot-pies I'd bought a few weeks ago. The things are maybe (maybe) 5 inches in diameter, and they can be microwaved. Not exactly raw food, but what is it? Some chicken, some veggies. Not too bad, right?

I made one for Jack and was feeding PJ and helping Jack eat while mine was cooking.

Jack was only interested in the crust, so I wound up eating the rest of his while I waited for mine.

With his little green baby fork.

Then I ate mine.

With his little green baby fork.

Then...I looked at the label.

Holy CRAP!

They were 640 calories.

EACH!

And let's not even talk about the sodium. Or the fat.

So I fell off the wagon. Note to self, frozen dinners in general are a no-no.

Especially when you don't even take the time to remove them from their little paper microwaveable pie plates and eat them with a fork that's as long as your finger. It was so not worth it.

It's salads today, baby.

Live and learn.

Fun at the pumpkin patch

Jack and his cousin, Kate.



Patrick and Jack discuss their pumpkin picking strategy. Or the upcoming election.



No, Jack. That's taking the easy way out!



PJ being PJ.



Jack gets the lay of the land and considers all his options.



Yes! This is the one!



A good time was had by all!

(Whoa! Is Mommy falling over?)

Office gossip

Ok, so it's not the kind where you talk about how you can't believe that so-and-so actually wore that particular wardrobe combo today.

But I need to talk about The Office.

The show.

Specifically, I want to know whether you think The Office has jumped the shark.

I'm feeling like perhaps it has.

The first episode of The Office that I saw was the Season 2 Christmas special. You know, the Secret Santa episode where Michael buys the iPod?

It's arguably the funniest sitcom Christmas episode ever, and I don't want to suggest that the series has gone downhill from there, because there have been several gems since then.

But since the writer's strike, I don't know. It just seems...different.

I mean, I love that Jim and Pam are engaged, but didn't the shenanigans surrounding their awkward and seemingly unrequited affections for each other keep us wondering whether it would ever happen? Now that it has, does it somehow change the anticipation of how their relationship will play itself out in each episode?

I still can't decide.

Vote in the poll to the right whether you think the shark has been jumped or not.

And maybe leave a comment with your thoughts.

Let's "tawk."

A busy fall...

This season has certainly brought with it a lot of activity!

Last weekend, we went to pick pumpkins at Milky Way Farm for my niece's birthday. My camera battery was dead, so I took some pictures with my sister-in-law's camera, which I'll post when she sends them to me. It was a gorgeous day, and we had lots of fun - hayrides, baby animals to pet, and, of course, time in the pumpkin patch picking out the perfect jack-o-lantern-to-be.


This past week, I had a book show for some grandmothers who wanted to do some holiday shopping for their grandchildren. It was a blast! If you have children on your holiday shopping list, consider checking out my Mystery Hostess show. You can get some great gifts and have a chance to win some free books for your family too! The hostess of my show on Wednesday received...are you ready?...$150 in free books! As you can imagine, she was thrilled!


On Saturday, we took Jack and PJ to the Strasburg Railroad again, only this time, we actually took a ride on the train. Jack was in heaven! We had such a fun time watching him. He'd been anticipating it for months now, since the last time we went, we told him that one day we'd take him for a ride on the "big black choo-choo."

First and foremost, we had to get a big bag of kettle corn for the trip. Sooo yummy - a little sweet, a little salty. (Oh yeah, the diet. Corn is a vegetable, right?)

The trains are just so well-maintained and beautiful. Here's the conductor waving as the train pulls into the station.



Waiting for our ride to start.



Jack was so stinking cute.



Checking out the beautiful farmland.



We all wore our Sox hats, hoping they'd pull through and make it to the series again.

(Missed it by that much!)

Anyway, PJ turned his head into Patrick's chest, and when he turned back, his hat looked like this.



How cute is this kid? He smiles about 99% of the day.

Even though he's teething something fierce.



Finally, yesterday, I tried my hand at Bakerella's cupcake pops for a birthday party last night.

If you want to try them yourself, you might be interested to know that I found the pops a lot easier to make than the bites (same thing without a stick), simply because I couldn't get the chocolate to dry smooth and flat enough on the bottom to get them to sit up and not topple over.

My biggest challenge was presentation, since they were just stuck into a white styrofoam rectangle and I didn't know what to do with it. I didn't really figure it out until we were en route to the party, but if I do them in the future (which I probably will), I'll put the styrofoam on a plate or in a basket, and put colorful curling ribbons - like the kind you buy to stick on top of a package - around the bottom to cover the styrofoam.

They were a little labor-intensive, but a lot of fun to make, and while I don't think mine came out quite as cute as hers did, they still looked good and tasted really yummy.





Not on the Raw Food diet, of course, but what I really liked about them was that one pop was two bites big, and totally enough.

Happy Monday!

Raw food - Day Five

The pounds are not falling off (I think I've lost one), but I feel really good on this diet so far.

Mostly, I'm enjoying the freedom from the guilt that comes after eating an entire row (or two) of double-stuf Oreos (seriously, why do they even bother making the regular-stuf kind?) in one sitting.

Do you know that guilt I'm talking about? I mean, not only do you feel lousy from eating all that sugar, but you also feel lousy for eating all that sugar.

Yet somehow, you feel compelled to do the same thing the next day with your kid's animal crackers. Or a half gallon of ice cream (actually, they're gypping us 1/4 of a quart these days, and selling ice cream by the 1.75 quart container, but I'm going to pretend not to be annoyed by this since I'm not a slave to sugar anymore...or at least not this week).

I still have until Wednesday to make it a full week.

And I think I'll tack on Thursday just because this past weekend was my niece's birthday and, well, I did have some ice cream.

In a waffle cone.

And a cupcake.

Is that wrong?

Actually, it's not. She talks about the fact that if you're eating mostly raw things, you'll have the enzymes you need to digest stuff like that once in a great while.

At least that's my interpretation of it.

So Thursday it is. I'll let you know the verdict.

I have to say, it's really curbed my appetite, and it's definitely easier to live with than I imagined it would be. The key is in the combinations of foods that make your body work most efficiently. More on that later.

I encourage you to get the book at the library and give it a glance. It's an easy read and really challenges everything you thought you knew about dieting.

Happy Monday, folks!

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The Story of Us - Part Three

I figure I'd better get this story moving along. November 5th is just around the corner.

The day I turned 30, I cried from the time I woke up to the time I fell asleep. This may be ok if you work in a cubicle, but it's not such a great thing when you're a teacher. I'd be able to pull myself together for most of the teaching time, but if the students were working on an activity, I was stifling sniffles and wiping away tears.

It wasn't really the turning 30 part, but rather, the idea that I'd hoped to be married by then. For whatever reason, I'd always had it in my head that 28 was the ideal marrying age. When 28 came and went, I thought, well maybe if I'm married by 30...(then what? My life would have purpose? I'd be validated as a person? Everything would be okay?) I never knew how that sentence was supposed to end, but here I was at 30, and I had hardly even dated, let alone had any serious relationships.

It was around this time that I'd decided to start giving Internet dating a try.

But Internet dating, I found, is a very bizarre way to date.

People can, and do, put up a good facade online.

Or they don't and you're left wondering why, if someone only has a little blurb in which to convince a member of the opposite sex that they're worth getting to know better, they didn't try a little harder.

Here are some actual samples from the profiles of people who contacted me.

Describing himself and who he'd like to meet, this one said:

A girl that likes go away at spermont on the weekends or go long rides or walks. Would like meet a women that likes joke. Likes scary movies and a women likes sex. A women that can open up to me.Im very normal guy wonts same as all other guys.I love to maintonbike and play sports.I dont like games of any cond.I like to cook.Looking into buy a house.I like play at the park play frezby or thorl ball around or rollerblade.

His headline said "Don't Pass Me Up!" Really? Watch me.

I mentioned that I taught biology, physics and French, and one guy emailed me with the subject line "Newton was right..." The message:

Hi, Well for every reaction there is definitly an equal and opposite reaction, nes pas?
I enjoyed your profile.....Tell me more?

Totally corny.

Another guy described himself in this way:

I am a responsible,down to earth guy....intelligent,honest,caring,loving,generous,goal oriented,adventurous, a Leo,romantic,fun, occasional drinker,healthy mentally,physically,and dentally! (LOL!),opinionated,an excellant lover,with a great sense of humor,and own my own vehicle.

To which I thought, Dude, you're 42. You have to say you have a car? (And you can't spell "excellent"?)

Perhaps I was a bit too critical, but there were many others like this, and it just made me wonder why, at a minimum, someone didn't just take the 30 extra seconds required to do a spell check.

There were others, of course, that were much more interesting. A few times, I'd exchange a lot of emails with people and maybe some (or several) phone calls before meeting them in person. This was usually a recipe for disaster, as we each tended to romanticize what the person was actually going to be like and inevitably, we'd fail to live up to each other's expectations.

Frustrated with the whole process, and feeling relatively stagnant in life in general, I decided it was time for a change. I needed to shake things up a little bit.

I decided to move to Boston.